An Ironic Bagpipes Project
THE RHODDIEPIPES O' LOCHALSH
by Ross Calderwood of Reraig
As far as we know, nobody has ever attempted to make bagpipes from Rhododendron ponticum. It has now been done - and why not? - by one of the top makers of small and border bagpipes, Ross Calderwood (Lochalsh Pipes). The result is a basic Scottish Smallpipe with interchangeable chanters in D and A supported by a pair of drones tuning to D/C and A/G. The bag, hidden within its pink fake mink cover [why?], is made of GORE-TEX, but the timber is traditional and appropriate for this campaign: locally sourced rhododendron. [Pedants might note that the drone stock is made of sycamore, a temporary measure while we wait for a thicker chunk of rhoddie to season.] The decorative black mounts are of African buffalo horn. The tone is scrumptious, not unlike the music of the familiar Northumbrian Bagpipe.
James Merryweather, Chairman of Skye & Lochalsh Environment Forum, who commissioned and plays the instrument [international debut at the Highland Biodiversity Forum at SNH headquarters, Inverness, 13-03-2010], has embarked upon a mission to publicise Lever & Mulch using a variety of media, including his lecture: "Problem? What Problem?" With any such enterprise, in which enhanced public understanding is the main goal, impact - eccentric if it seems right - is vital. As long as the core message is not trivialised, the occasional gimmick can be used to implant markers in people's minds, the more memorable the better. This can be achieved through a lively presentation illustrated by glorious pictures, but something a bit more dramatic always helps people not to forget the event. Just wait till you see the bag cover I have in mind!
An introit on bagpipes is bound to attract attention anyway, but if they have been fashioned from the villain of the piece and the tunes played are specially composed, all the better. So here they are, the revolutionary Rhoddiepipes with some revolutionary tunes* celebrating the revolutionary Lever & Mulch rhoddie bashin' method.
A CELEBRITY BAGPIPER'S RESPONSE: "I was vaguely aware of the R.p. issue, but now my vagueness is banished. I feel the Rhoddiepipes should play in a mode other than mixolydian - perhaps a new one called HypoRhododendronian." Jon Swayne, bagpipe maker, virtuoso English bagpiper, originator of a new English bagpiping culture and President of The Bagpipe Society.
* RHODDIEPIPE TUNES
LAMENT FOR THE BLUEBELLS, cruelly evicted by Rhododendron ponticum MP3 PDF
RHODDIE BASHIN' MP3 PDF
RHODODENDRON PONTICUM MP3 PDF
also, from John Playford's The Dancing Master:
HAM HOUSE or CHERRY GARDEN MP3 PDF
A RIGADOON & ARGEERS MP3 PDF
and also
OVER THE HILLS AND FAR AWAY MP3 PDF